Doogie Howser, man arouser?

So, Neil Patrick Harris comes out of the closet and announces with a flamboyant flourish that he is "a very content gay man living my life to the fullest."

Good for you, Doogie. First Lance Bass, now NPH. Could it be we're witnessing a culture shift where more and more celebrities are willing to put their prestige on the line and admit to the world who they are? It'll be a watershed moment when nobody feels the need to stay in the closet anymore.

Although I have to say, this paints his performance in Harold & Kumar Go to White Castlein a whole new light.

NPH wouldn't do that!

Oh wait, I guess he would.

Would you like to know more?

So Vinnie Delpino grows up to be a mobster and Doogie grows up to be a poofter.

What a mad, mad, mad, mad, mad world.

Epcot Unveils "OJ Simpson: The Ride!"

Mission: SPACE has now killed as many people as America's favorite hall of fame running back. Thanks, Disney, for such a feat of Imagineering. I wonder if they'll start selling commemorative coffins in the Mission: SPACE gift shop.

I wonder if Michael Eisner will be scouring the golf courses of Florida looking for the "real killer." Oh wait, that's right, he no longer works at Disney. He now has a talk show on CNBC that gets a ZERO rating. Like John McEnroe's. So let's open up the floor for discussion:

Who deserves a talkshow less than John McEnroe or Michael Eisner?

The Sopranos returns with a bang!

Goddamn. That hour of television was worth my whole cable bill. And if you don't want Sopranos spoilers, you're on the wrong planet, because the only thing anyone will be talking about next week is Uncle Junior shooting Tony. Sorry if I just ruined it for you. Somebody was going to do it, and probably tomorrow. I don't have a water cooler so I need to get my shots in wherever I can find them.

HBO didn't show a preview for next week, which was kind of disappointing but understandable. They want to get a week's worth of "Is Tony dead?" buzz.

The answer, of course, is no. The buzz generated by the shock value of Tony's shooting would be more than overwhelmed by the dramatic lameness of that as a story arc. Only Christopher or Johnny should get to kill Tony. Nothing else would be "right." Two things about this storyline that amused me - Tony snapping "it's a nursing home!" when Melfi referred to Green Grove as a retirement community, and Junior hiding in the closet afterwards. The fact that they alluded to a Tony heart attack the entire episode, then pulled this out of their asses... that, my friends, is what we call a swerve.

I don't remember Gene at all, but apparently he was made at the same time as Christopher. I thought that he was going to be Vito's pointman as he takes his role as this season's would-be usurper and Tony Soprano nemesis. But they certainly nipped that in the bud. I could relate to his angst over not being able to get the hell out of New Jersey. (Note to my New Jersey readers: I am not referring to my hasty departure from the Garden State, but my many thwarted attempts to escape the Commonwealth of Suck.)

Other thoughts on the episode:

• I have the feeling that the whole Vito-Tony thing will come to a head at Meadow's wedding.
• Lots of stuff in this episode seemed like a "reset" - granted, a LOT of time has passed since the last episode, but it definitely seemed like they were setting out the rules of engagement for this season.
• Poor Artie. Why are you getting back together with Charmaine? Don't do that. I bet he tries to kill himself again by episode 10.
• I wonder how much Nesquik paid to get that lovingly lingering pan on its ad on Bobby's train. And holy crap did he look stupid in that hat.
• Janice is breeding again?!?
• Meadow's milkshake was a quality television moment. For Finn it would almost be worth dealing with her whining if that sort of thing happened on the reg.
• AJ's mullet: WTF?

Can't wait for next week's episode. Only thing I'm upset about is that for some reason FOX doesn't come in on my TV hooked into the non-digital cable, so I couldn't watch the Family Guy and then start the Sopranos at 9:30 like I was planning on it. Good thing for Adult Swim reruns.